Hey guys, prom is right around the corner. Make it memorable.
Hey baltimore so like queer danse prom garbage is coming up…who wants to date it up real gay style with me?
and my snacks
I love you, i love you, i love you, i do. Blame it on your wild heart.
A. Quit smoking (I’m nine days tar free, I can take these wonderfully deep breaths.)
B. Think hard about which thing is the best thing to do.
C. Figure out how to learn a trade
D. Figure out how to live in a space that functions better. More space, less trash. Create a work area that makes sense with lots of light. Have personal outdoor space.
E. Throw away most clothing
F. Get some space get some goddamn space oh my god.
G. Find the friends, talk to them, make them feel as important as they truly are. Because guess what, people die and then you wish that you had called them a thousand times more.
H. Paint the ceilings
I. Think about breathing
J. Try to control your critical nature. Seriously try, dont tell folks how to live their lives. Deal with the fallout. Focus on something else.
K. Remember you’re alive and you can walk and talk and brush your hair and do whatever the hell you feel like doing whenever you want to do it. Stop fucking wallowing oh my god you have the entire world to play with just fucking go do it and be alive, be so alive people get blinded by you.
Im gonna blow my life the fuck up, in a good way.
Also I havent smoked a cig in almost nine days.
Bright Eyes - You Will. You? Will. You? Will. You? Will
Now I write when I’m away, letters that you’ll never read. You said go explore those other women, the geography of their bodies- but there’s just one map you’ll need. You’re a boomerang you’ll see. You will return to me.
In my dream last night Matt Toby was there and all the rest of my friends were there at a big danksgiving celebration, but it wasn’t like the super sad danks that is going to happen on Friday, it was like regular. And Matt Toby had made these really funny t-shirts and was trying to sell them to people, but when he saw me he ran up and kissed my face and told me that I was shining so bright that I could have one//”Aw babygirl you can just have one, I love you! Have some beer too.” So I took this shirt from him and put it on over my clothes and then he took me by the shoulders and told me that everything is gonna be alright because there is so much to give danks too, and even when I can’t afford the shirts I want, there will be something else I can have instead. And he smiled that perfect smile and hugged me.
I woke up and thought to call Matt Toby and tell him about my dream because it was so tender, but I forgot that I’m living a nightmare now, and that I can’t call him and text him in the middle of the night when things are bad and scary. I can’t call him in the morning because I wanna tell him something funny. I can’t do anything but sit on this couch.